Thanks to Alan Archibald for this one.
I think some of this may be a repeat but I figure if I don't remember, you probably don't either. In case you were thinking learning Karen or Mandarin was a challenge, imagine learning English.
Complexities of English
- The bandage was wound around the wound.
- The farm was used to produce produce.
- The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
- We must polish the Polish furniture.
- He could lead if he would get the lead out.
- The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
- Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
- A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
- When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes
- I did not object to the object.
- The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
- There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row
- They were too close to the door to close it.
- The buck does funny things when the does are present.
- A seamstress and a sewer fell into a sewer line.
- To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
- The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
- Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
- I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
- How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
***
"We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
yet the plural of moose should never be meese
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
but though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.
If Dad is Pop, how come Mom isn't Mop?..."
We also want to share this great email we recently got in reference to this blog. We need a publisher!
Hello,
A while back you had on your email you sent out quirky sentences that, because of the many pronunciation exceptions in the English language, are challenging to say for non native speakers.
It set me to thinking about this and, for the fun of it, I tried to come up with a sentence playing on the differences in English with the "_ow" words -- words that have both the "o" as in boat sound and "ow" as in ouch! sound -- that would be challenging but fun for non native speakers. For what it is worth I offer the sentence below.
Regards,
Zach Kelleher
...and Emily, now grown,
in her newly sewn gown,
and yellow bow in her crow-black hair,
in deference, slowly bows,
as the crowd below flows by,
not knowing how it got to be,
that it is she
who now will wear the crown.
